breaking news dept.

Here at the ALLDERBLOB we try to keep up with the news on a daily, if not hourly basis.

News of the city, nay, the very planet itself, spirals though the seive known as the ALLDERBLOB, and what remains we offer up for the tasseography of our astute readers.

Needless to say, we are proud of what we have accomplished in 2006: the near-total eradication of car advertising in the major papers of the land.

Um, not.

Actually, it’s a little discouraging.

What’s discouraging is the disappearance of interest among our friends. Do they even care? Did they notice our sad, quiet, lack of postings this past month? Did they notice that we haven’t put anything new up since December 3, 2006?

Hmph.

Enough. What about Case Ootes, you’re asking. What happened in Ward 29.

The news came back in the local car advertiser, the Riverdale/East York Mirror, that the ward whose poll reported late, the one that gave Ootes his pathetic “margin of victory” [perhaps of it had been “our” margin of victory it would not have been pathetic but triumphant. Never mind. –ed.] of 20 votes, was the so-called “Governor’s Bridge” section of Toronto. It’s this section, with its plywood mansions overlooking the Don Valley from the edge of Rosedale, a section that is no more a part of the Danforth Peninsula than Case Ootes’s own home in Ward 31 [on a car-free ravine-lot cul-de-sac north of the Taylor Creek Ravine –ed.], that has thrown Mayor David Miller his familiar scapegoat for another four years.

Governor’s Bridge, we understand your frustration. We “get it” that no one in Rosedale accepts you for what you are, people with money that’s just as good as theirs (god damn it). We understand your frustration, having to vote in Ward 29 when really, you should be part of Ward 27, with your true peers in Rosedale, or even ward 26, where the heroic and yellow-hatted efforts of “Jane Pitfield for Mayor” gave David Miller his sole loss among Toronto’s 44 wards.

Governor’s Bridge, we hail thee. You have demonstrated how totally out-of-touch the Danforth Peninsula is with the forces that matter in this city. Ward 29 has what it deserves, thanks to you. It has a councillor who understands the role of East York relative to Toronto proper: a place that’s necessary to drive through in order to get somewhere that matters. And the screw was turned by folks who wouldn’t know Pape Avenue from Donlands Ave, or Cosburn from O’Connor. It’s the folks of Governor’s Bridge, in their “fewer than 200 homes,” for whom the city of Toronto has to thank for another four years of the Odious spectacle.

Governor’s Bridge, as you drive in your Merdredes Benzes through the storied streets of Rosedale on your way home these next four years, know that the laughter you hear from the real stone houses that line your way is not at you, but with you.

Grumble.

As for 2007, big deal. Bring it on. As we reach our 10,000th reader, and a google search of the phrase “no salesman will call” places the ALLDERBLOB at number three in 1.5 million hits, we feel ready for anything.

One Response to “breaking news dept.”

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    [...] in Toronto’s East End. Who’s looking out for us? Councillor Case Odious with your twenty-vote margin of victory, there’s a vacuum to be [...]

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