Eastern Avenue motorcycle lanes report

Here at the blob of blobs, all-der-blob, all de time, we are known to speak sophistry and carry a bigs tick. When we’s peak, you’s lissen.

Lissen. Lissen good.

This sort of arrogance does not go unnoticed, needles to sashay.

For example, in our blobbering about Eastern Avenue and its problematic proposal for cyclists-as-speed-bumps, two weeks ago, we happened to mention the existence of a so-called “Hell’s Angel’s” motorcycle gang club-house on that street. We pointed this out by way of suggesting that “motorcycle lanes” might be more appropriate road improvements on Eastern, since no self-propelled cycloid we knew had any reason to ride the street.

Unfortunately, in our naive posting on the Hell’s Angel’s, we linked to their website.

Immediately, we noticed two things: one was a surge in the number of spam messages to the ol’ blob. We went from 30 messages a day to 150 or more. The other was a significant lowering of the tenor of said messages: the proportion of tramadol-type offers dropped; that of tranny-doll-type ones went stratospheric.

Unfortunately for the biker-types, the attention brought to them by our acknowledgment of their existence was their undoing. A couple days ago the Ontario Provincial Police pounced on them, knocking a hole through the washroom wall by way of finding entrance and removing their lovely skull-pture to be sold to the highest bidder on Craigslist.

Watch for it.

The good news is our spam messages have sunk back to normal.

The bad news is Walmart is going to take the removal of the Hell’s Angels from Eastern as an invitation for their own form of “gang-related activity.”

And finally, speaking of people who need to lissen, lissen good, we note that Toronto Councillor Paula Fletcher (ward 30) has pulled back from the brink with her original Eastern Avenue bikelane proposal. Word is she has gone to the neighbouring councillor, Sandra Bussin (ward 32), asking for cooperation. She wants to extend the proposed bikelanes across the dreaded Leslie Street to the East, where it would link with proposed bikelanes on Knox, leading south to Lakeshore bikelanes and north to the bikelanes proposed for Greenwood.

2 Responses to “Eastern Avenue motorcycle lanes report”

  1. Spin says:

    Needles to sashay? Hamish seems to rubbing off on you.


    [...] In the past we have commented on this foolhardy scheme. The fact is, except for the skateboard kids at the bottom end of Pape avenue (Pape dies at Eastern, where it’s super wide, and super dead, with a painted median like that on the much busier Danforth Avenue, but one which here provides only a hangout spot for kids on skateboards all night long), no one will use the Eastern Ave bikelanes. No one except for cars idling while they “run in” for a quick purchase at the soon-to-open Walmart down there. [...]

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